


How does a Moment last Forever?

by felicityollies



Series: Tale as old as Time [4]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Disorder, F/M, Family, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-01-22
Packaged: 2019-03-08 06:32:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13452528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felicityollies/pseuds/felicityollies
Summary: Scars aren't always on the outside. Oliver deals with his every day of his life, especially after the birth of his first child.





	How does a Moment last Forever?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [muslimsmoak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/muslimsmoak/gifts).



> okay i have to say that i’m glad you asked me to write for cursed bc i love these babies and writing about oliver’s anxiety always makes me feel better... so thank you and i hope you enjoy!!

Oliver let out a slow breath. He rocked back and forth in a white, wooden rocking chair. In his arms he held his son, Jonas Michael. Felicity once told him that his own middle name meant _dove_. A dove was peace, it was beauty, and it was exactly what he saw in his son. He kept his eyes closed as he continued to rock. Jonas slept peacefully, for once. It had been a long month since he’d come home from the hospital. Oliver was so excited to meet this tiny human. His son. A beautiful being he and Felicity created.

But at the same time he found his anxiety rising. He was scared he would do something wrong. That he might drop him or he wouldn’t feed him properly. Or a million other scenarios that went through his head. He couldn’t bare the thought of not being a good parent. It was hard enough learning to get out of the house and face the world. Teach himself the people weren’t out there to judge him and make him feel bad. It made him feel like he took a million steps back when he was afraid in his own home again.

_“Oliver,” his therapist said, “You had a big change in your life, it’s okay to be anxious about it.”_

_“But I had so much time to prepare…”_

_John Diggle gave him one of his signature eyebrow raises. The look that always made him rethink what he said. It wasn’t a judgemental expression. He knew that._

_Oliver sighed heavily, “Anxiety doesn’t give a crap if I prepare. All I can do is take a deep breath, cope with it, and move forward.”_

_He liked John. His therapist had been through the army, he had a lot of his own struggles, and freely shared them with Oliver to help him through his bad weeks._

_“I’m scared,” he mumbled quietly, “I don’t want to screw up.”_

_“You know why you’re not going to screw up?”_

_Oliver shook his head._

_“Because you don’t want to. You’re not going to let yourself.”_

_They talked about this before. When he worried about falling into his old habits and hiding away from Felicity. He wouldn’t go back to that because he didn’t want to. He wanted to change and be a stronger person. Now, he wasn’t going to let himself be a bad parent._

John talked to him. Felicity talked to him. And he was almost shocked to discover that she was scared too. It was relieving. They could be scared and figure it out together. He just had to keep working on his anxiety. It was something that would never go away, but he could cope with it. Deal with the bad days.

But then there were days like these, when he didn’t have a book editor breathing down his neck, the monster that was his anxiety was resting at the back of his mind, and his son was sleeping in his arms. He felt at peace. The only thing he was missing was Felicity. She had a phone call in the other room; she was only on partial maternity leave. Workaholic, but he didn’t mind. She was running the company better than he ever could. The upgrades and changes she had made were amazing. She put younger blood in and they were coming up with tech he could barely wrap his head around. All he knew was Felicity Smoak was the brightest star and she had only just begun.

“Sorry about that,” she whispered as she came back into the room.

“It’s okay,” he said without opening his eyes.

She wrapped her arm around his shoulders and kissed his temple, “The science division got into a fight over funding.”

“Why’s that?”

“There was a miscommunication,” she sighed, resting her head against his, “Everything is fine now and they’re working on a piece of technology I am so excited about,” her voice started to rise.

“Shhh.”

“Sorry,” she whispered, “It’s a computer processor that puts the current market to shame.”

“I’m proud of you,” he whispered back.

She nuzzled into his hair before pulling back. He leaned his head up for a kiss.

“How’re you doing today?” she asked.

“I’m having a good day.”

“I’m glad,” she kissed his forehead.

He closed his eyes and hummed happily. Their attention was pulled away when a soft yawn filled their ears. He looked down at Jonas. The newborn scrunched up his nose and stared up at them with big blue eyes. He could barely see the little bit of dirty blonde hair he had peeking out from under his hat. Jonas wore a matching yellow onesie. He was the cutest damn thing and Oliver loved him with every fiber of his being.

“How’re you doing, little man?” he asked.

Jonas yawned again, this time making a spit bubble.

Felicity snorted, “Still so sleepy,” she poked his nose.

He wriggled his nose and sneezed in Oliver’s face.

“Thank you,” he laughed.

Felicity giggled, “Sorry… again.”

“I bet he’s hungry, though.”

“Probably,” she started to take him, but he didn’t want to let go, “Oliver.”

“But.”

“I know, but mommy is also hungry.”

He begrudgingly let go. She always knew how to get him. He loved cooking for her and would always take the opportunity to do so. He even planned to make Jonas’ baby food for him when the time came. There would be no jarred baby food in their house.

Felicity kissed his lips gently, “After we eat we can all crawl into bed and snuggle.”

“Promise?”

She kissed him again, “Promise.”

One of his favorite pastimes was curling up in bed with his girlfriend and his son, holding them both in his arms or even better being held. It made him feel so warm, happy, and safe.

“I love you,” he finally stood, so she could sit in the rocking chair.

“I love you too,” she slid into the chair.

“And I love you,” he cradled his son’s head and kissed it gently, “More than anything.”

He stole one last kiss from Felicity before finally leaving them to make food. His heart was soaring and his smile was wide. It was definitely a good day.

**Author's Note:**

> let me know what you think!
> 
> tumblr & twitter: felicityollies


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